Wednesday, March 18, 2009

It's Not My Fault You Hate Your Job

Me: "Hi, I just had this textbook out and it's due back now, but I was wondering if I could take it out again please?"

Librarian: "You have to wait 15 minutes in between taking the same book out."

Me: "Oh, but won't you be closed in 10 minutes?"

Librarian: "Yes."

Me: "Oh, ok, well in that case, would you like to suck on my dick instead?"

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Me: "Hi, I'm looking for a student who goes to school here. His name is Sean and I actually can't remember his last name but-"

Secretary: "Well how am I supposed to help you if you don't know his last name?! Just Sean?? I don't know every Sean in the school! I really can't help you."

*storms off to issue more late slips for 13 year old stoners.*

Me: "...-but I know his homeroom....? Oh, I'm sorry, you probably couldn't hear me over the dull roar of mediocrity. I know dreams can be pretty loud when they're crushed repeatedly. You take good care."

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