Tuesday, September 15, 2009

A Divine Intervention.

I really want to comment on the Kanye/Taylor incident, but it's still so fresh, you know? I'm still so hurt and I just need to take a little time to create some new four letter words to describe pretentious piece of turd.

Instead, this little doozy:

Today was my second day of biking in Montreal. It's nerve wracking, my quads are killing me, but I get to work 200% faster, so it's all good. Until this; I'm biking down Sherbrooke today, it's rush hour, I'm trying not to get my ass pinched between the moving cars and the parked ones, I decide it's too busy so I cruise down to Maisoneuve, continuing west towards the rich anglo district. Once on Maisoneuve I realize there's a bike lane on the left side, but I can't get over because there's so much traffic so I decide to wait until the next corner, then get over. Cool. Not. Get this: a grey minivan pulls up beside me, rolls down the passenger window and the driver who is a nun yells at me"THERE'S A BIKE LANE OVER THERE YOU KNOW!!!!" A nun. A woman of god. A religious penguin. And you can't yell at a nun, even if you're yelling back. I figured the closest thing you can get away with is sarcasm so I gave her one of these: "Ohhhh, yeahhhh, thaaaaanks."

Hindsight, what I should have yelled was one of these:

"It's okay, I'm not getting laid either!"
"I bet you'd be nicer with a cock in your mouth!"
"Your religion is a sham!"
"You call that God's work?!"

But my personal favorite:

"God forgives you!"

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