Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Constitutional Law is Rarely Funny

I have a midterm tomorrow and despite what many might think, constitutional law can be funny. Let me make the case:

First point: names of justices.

- Justice Louis-Phillipe Pigeon
- Hon. Jean Beetz
- Hon. Frank Iacobucci
- Hon. Michael Bastarache
- Hon. Morris Fish

Eg, While Justice Bastarache concurred with the majority in this decision, he chose to write a separate set of opinions thereby extending the length of the reading by 9 pages. Pffft, what a bastarache!

In my opinion Justice Fish fails to acknowledge the jurisprudence set by Justice Pigeon in his comparison of wings and gills.

Eg, Justice Beetz has opted out of sitting on the case of Borscht v. Stew due to what he describes as a vested interest in the outcome. When asked what he meant he replied, "What can I say, I'm a Beetz!"

Second, they straight up look like Santa Claus. If Justice Fish had a beard he would take reindeer to work:

The only difference between these two groups is in the amount of fun they're having:

In the case of Naughty v. Nice the court finds unanimously that Tommy is guilty of twelve counts of teasing, bullying and name calling as filed by the complainant, his little sister Betty. In response to the court's decision his parents have decided to invoke Section 33, attaching a clause to his wish list which reads, "Notwithstanding the decision of the Santa's, we are going to go ahead and buy Tommy a powerwheels anyway."

Thirdly, in Gosselin v Quebec Chief Justice McLachlin held that there was not a Section 7 violation because the issue at hand was not connected to the administration of justice. Justice Bastarache found that there was also not a Section 7 violation for the reason that the issue at hand was not shown to be connected to a definitive state action. Then only three years later in Chaoulli v. Quebec Justices McLachlin and Bastarache along with Justice Major found that there WAS a section 7 violation even though there was NEITHER definitive state action nor was it regarding the administration of justice! Pfft! Whaaakkkkkuuuuft? Isn't that funny?? Isn't that CRAZY???

...I need to go home.

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